Retro Rated – Cage Match

Taken from Our Picks – Scott’s Retro Selection;

There were hundreds of games released on the Spectrum, dozens of indisputable classics and this was…not one of them.

So why does it make the list? Because it taught my 8 year old self an important lesson.

Picture the scene. WWF wrestling is spreading across the world. Hulkamania is running wild (brother), you are browsing the game section in WH Smiths and this one title catches your eye. Cage Match!Cage Match

You dig deep into your pockets but come up short. No! But wait, here comes your brother so you pool resources and hand over your £1.99. You dash home, taking turns on the bus to read the back cover of the cassette, excitement building as you storm through the front door, switch off whatever drivel Dad is watching, plug in the trusty Spectrum, somehow endure the agonising wait as the game loads as only a Spectrum game can until finally it is here and you take control of your avatar, ready to lock horns with your CPU controlled adversary in combat so bloodthirsty it can only be held in by a cage…which he promptly runs up the side of and wins.

Is that it? Surely there must be some mistake. Eagerly you read through the scant instructions again, looking for some nugget of information missed. Nope.

The controller is passed around, perhaps someone else will discover the secret of this undoubted moment of video gaming history? Nope.

Desperately, forlornly, you come back to it each day, hoping against fading hope that there is more. Nope.

You have learned an important lesson.

Some games are crap.

 

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